Emmanuel and all that it entails
All the Melo-Drama unfit to print.


I like my mediocorness. (Like Spelling) My strengths may be weakness but, here in lies the secret of my success, my weaknesses are strengths. Everyone has weaknesses but, making mine the most manageable (eventually dealing with them) and optimizing my strengths without introducing new weaknesses is key. Strengths are for Great people, living Great lives. Greatness is not a great as Great people would have you belive. It only looks that way. The only thing that's Great about that life is the problems. You couldn't pay me enough money to have a Great life. People don't apprciate Great people, they envy them, belittle their Greatness, follow blindly and complain when they find the problems inherent in a Great life. Mediocre is the place to be. Enough is as Great as a feast, a Great man once said (off of Jessica's bubbs resume, so it must be Great) and why go out asking for problems, don't enough come one already? Finding the balance of Problems vs. Greatness is the key. Finding out where you want to be. What you want out of life. Anyone can do anything if they set their mind to it. In other words, if you want it enough, you can have it. The more I live, the more I find that for most Great things, I don't want them, enough.

There is the problem of just sheer laziness, not doing what you should just to survive (on the many levels of survival [Why does television have to ruin perfectly good words?]) but, the question of Greatness is as far as I have seen, optional. OK, maybe being called of God isn't optional. You can learn alot of stuff from hanging out with missionaries-in-training. They have the strangest outlook on life. They know they are going to suffer. They are sitting, half-naked (nakedness, emotionally, seems to be a large part of ICS [InterCultual Studies] program at Biola) on the Doctor's office, waiting for a shot. This isn't just a shot for them, many real people kinda hang in the balance because of them. They don't heal people but, they kinda spread the disease that will heal them. They help the people while waiting for them to catch the disease. Sometimes, the best way for the disease to spread is through a missionaries death. They are training to be Great. Missions work is the hardest thing at Biola. Forget computer science, if I forget what struct goes where, I'm not going to damn some poor person in Belize in eternal damnation. OK, that's a bit extreme but, the prices of greatness are on a different scale.

Living as I do, in mediocrity (Hurray for proper english (or as proper as this mutt of english education can get)) is not so bad as has been pointed out by many a poet (who, in their lives, have lived as some of the greatest cowards in history; Emily Dickenson, hello?). Take the lillies of the god-damn field, they don't live Great lives, or do they? They take dirt, sun and air and make it into a pale yellow smile for God and anyone lucky enough to be close enough to be. No person hinges on the beauty of a flower but, it is beautiful. Now if every flower stopped blooming, we might see a small rise in the worldwide depression rate or more divorces happening in the West but, one flower is not going to be the end of anyone.

Life would be perfect as that one flower. Shine for God and die quietly. (I'm sounding like I should be shopping for log cabins...) What more could one want? That's the exact problem, one wanting. One almost lusting after an easy life. I'll be the first to admit that mediocrity is selfish. There are too many situations where you have to be Great. Child-rearing being one of them. No one deserves to be raised in mediocrity, if a parent can avoid it, or do they? Ultimately, that person that you produce will be a stranger, they are a stranger when they come and a stranger when they go. Parent-Child Relationships are for mortals. The model falls on its face after only the first 25 years of life of the child. After adulthood, children are children by society and title. This is what we talked about at the "Thing" last week. It's this idea that both child and parent come to. Everyone except me and Stephanis had the Western view of it where it was just lived out, my moving out, going to college, etc. Stephanis and I had a distinctly non-western view of it where we were kinda locked in the parent-child relationship with death being the only way out. They seems to be from the financial adantage of having a small factory of moneymakers at your disposal, paying you tribute; like a King and peasents. I feel that this has to do with the classic monarchy standard of calling your King, Lord, in referencing to God who we should really be calling Father. In a strange twist of hermanutics, "honor thy father and mother" in the bible really as a financial connotation rather than a respectful obdience connotation that parents use against us with so much furvor. Don't you just love people who go back in the greek to get this stuff? Almost makes you want to put the extra year in college, doesn't it? Almost is the key word.

Just a little stray thought of you and life at work.

posted by gimptek | 8/07/2001 11:50:00 AM